Sometimes I do not understand myself.

When I think, I am such and such type of person. Sometimes, I just behave oppositely. Sometimes, I got irritated by my own behavior, it often becomes unusual type. Why this happens?

Do I not know myself or I do not understand myself?

I think I know myself but I do not understand myself or never ever tried to understand myself.

Sometimes I think, are all these following reasons which are making my behavior strange.

Most of the time, I keep on just putting so many conditions and workload on me without asking what my heart wants to do? And also I am not free what I want to do? Do such force or compulsion irritate me and make my behavior strange. This may be the first reason.

Does my lots of expectations with myself making me selfish and thus behave strangely, and also doing such work which is against my behavior or liking or rather is it the expectations for me by others. This may be the second reason.

Sometimes this compulsion comes from seeing other who are very successful in their life in many respect and have got everything in their life. This may be the third reason.

Or it is the unfulfilled wishes of the life, small-small things in life that makes a complete life which we want to get but not actually getting due to lack of time? Is this making my behavior strange that is wanting some other thing and trying to get some other thing?

This may be the fourth reason.

If we keep on going against our wishes then at last, we realize that we are not what we actually are. We are not original, but we are now duplicate or can say that we are just copycat.

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