The year is almost over and I was sitting in my balcony thinking about life in the past year. Things which happened to me. Some good things and some not so good. Overall the year was pretty bad for me. My life right now is miserable. I am not at the college of my choice. But what the heck.!! This is life and this is it. If this was something in my bag then be it. I am ready to face and it’s cool, my college is not that bad, at least it’s A Grade and I am pursuing Engineering of my choice. Well let’s come back to the balcony, it’s sun-set right now and I was thinking about 2012. And I remembered a day, two days before my IIT-JEE exam I had visited a place where I found peace.
I was in 12th and because of JEE and other stuff I didn’t go anywhere as such. The whole year it was classes-home-college and that’s it. But one special place I visited couple of days before my exam really shook me. JEE was near and I was freaked out, to be frank, my chances of getting through weren’t that great, I hoped I could drop a year but even that I could not do because of our “great” minister Kapil Sibal. The state of my mind was such that all I remembered is a blah!! It was really tough time for me. It’s not that I wasn’t bright enough, this is something only a fellow IIT aspirant could understand.
I and my friend named Omkar just decided we would play football for sometime just to get refreshed. So in a lawn in our complex we were practicing and the ball suddenly went over the wall outside our complex and there’s no roadway through which we could get there. The ball was Jabulani, it cost like 6k, we couldn’t have just left it there, so we jumped over the wall and there was 6 foot tall grass. Now I don’t know if it was grass or what, but lets call it a plant, it was extremely bushy, we couldn’t get a sight of it. So we took a bamboo and started bending the grass, but wait that was not the only problem, the land was marshy, so we had to step on the bent grass, somehow we managed to get the ball. We climbed the wall somehow and came back. A thought crossed our mind, it was really cool to go down there and get the ball, like an expedition, it was adventurous and fun so we decided to go on a trek on a mountain behind our complex.
I lied to my mom, obviously, saying I am going at a friend’s place to solve doubts. We went to a super-market which is in the complex, bought 2 bottles of cold-drinks and some snacks and headed for the mountain. It was 2pm!! so hot!! Still we were going, we walked we walked and we walked. The locations were so beautiful. Our complex looked pretty amazing from there. We reached a spot and decided to take a break. So we sat down, looking at mountain, staring at the sky, enjoying the mild-breeze and enjoying he serenity of nature. It may not sound that awesome but the situation was such that we enjoyed even that. After a while we got up and continued our expedition
We went on, climbing one mountain after the another, lost our way once, but came back to the same spot and continued. To describe this place or this journey is so difficult. It wasn’t special and it wasn’t fancy, it was simple and subtle but still I loved it because it wasn’t about the place but the way it made me feel.
After sometime we found a small pond, near a mandir and there were trees surrounding the pond, we sat beneath a tree near the pond. We were out of cold-drinks and all we had was kurkure, which made us more thirsty. We saw some small fish in the pond so we fed them the kurkure and it was funny. There were like hundreds of them, kurkure was gone in seconds, they actually attacked it!! It was getting late so we thought its time to go back.
We were tired as hell and to walk the same distance was close to impossible so we thought of some other way to get back. We chose a route and headed forward. For a while we had no signs of our buildings ,and yes it happened we were lost!! Which road to follow was difficult to decide, we were just going on in some direction. After a while we saw a guy coming with tractor, huff!! Thank God, he came. We asked him to give us a lift..!! Both of us had never traveled in a tractor, it wasn’t a big deal but still in that mood and serenity it seemed special. He provided us the directions of our further journey as he was going in other direction. We were almost near our complex and it was sunset, from those those mountains the sunset was so beautiful, the orange-blue sky, it was like some great artist had painted the sky.
We reached our complex and headed home, I came back, took a shower, was tired like hell and sun-tanned too. I crashed on my bed and slept, woke up for the dinner and after that came to my balcony and looked at the stars in the sky. I thought if it was wrong of me to waste a day like that,when my exam was in two days. I had no answers, I was guilty and happy. I felt calm and refreshed. I knew in my heart I wont crack IIT-JEE but that night I decided, so what if I cant crack it, at least I will face it as a warrior and die like one. The results were the same, I didn’t crack JEE and I was disappointed, not because I didn’t get through but I couldn’t make my parents proud.
What I learnt this year is I am brave. After I got the result I didn’t shed a single tear and thought life is too beautiful to cry for small failure. Life is big and beautiful and surely opportunities would come. Even if I am a loser today, I know someday I will make my parents and myself proud!!